game over

early again, Fear, well i’m almost out of tea.
i remember your handshake too well from your night visits,
and i wonder how your strikes
only tickle the old and young with naivete.

i remember our wrestling matches and
your unjust resources;
i was a greater victim to these weapons
that came from the optometrist's mouth,
"retinal detachment" throbbing like a cut in my head.

i remember falling to your brother Fate.

i remember waking and wondering why i'd opened my eyes on the other side of the moon when the truth hit me like your fist.

i struggled to escape my eternal night chains
and spill them through unseeing eyes,
begged the world to break my mind
as you had broken my vision
but nemesis was off-duty.
thus life lost all its vividness and
i lost sight of the future
i could no longer have, no longer wanted.

but our chat is not for reminiscence.
you see, i have an ally this time:
Fate sits at your side, well
he sits at mine.

my friend, you forget.
you forget love, and his embrace is my sun,
illuminating, energizing, gravitational, guiding,
compared to your useless death-grip.
you forget that i tally not the nights but
the stars you can't cut from my memory,
for he will count them for me.